My buddy Mike and I were having our usual AIM conversation…bullshitting about this, bullshitting about that…you know, the usual shit. Essentially, imagine two hyenas trying to make each other laugh SLASH cry.

Well today, my friends, I laugh, and Mike…well…Mike CRIES.

There’s this on-going territorial battle between males over instant messengers…we try to always one up each other. Whether it be pointless arguments, out linking one another, or out LOL’ing the other. These sorts of shenanigans are probably lost on vaginas, but you know what? I don’t give a SHIT.

Mike and I have been having this epic, mind-fuck battle for several months. Many of you have been a victim of it, in one shape or form, but many of you are weak. Mike and I…we are strong. We are always on the look out…we are always watching, and waiting. Waiting for the subtle mistake…the subtle misstep…when your guard is down…WE POUNCE!

Today was my day to POUNCE.

Mike and I were discussing how hot the new VP candidate is that Mr. “I’m going to ruin the country if you elect me” McCain picked. Mike’s going on and on about how hot she is. So I’m thinking “you know what? let me Google image this bitch, and see what’s what.” ‘Cause you know, even if she’s hot in some pics, chances are that I’ll be able to find some really juicy uggo pics of her, just the same.

I’m looking. I’m hunting.

I find several pics of her, and you know what? I’ll be damned if I can’t find a really uggo one of her. So I’m now thinking, “Shit. What if Mike’s right? Then…then what…do I lose?” I can’t lose. I’m fucking Jeff, after all. Give me a break.

Innovation happens.

I link Mike to the first pic I find of her, to see his reaction. Then I link him to a second one…but you know what I did for this second one? That’s right, I Rick-Roll’d him, friends. So I’m waiting in anticipation, to see if I succeeded or not. Rick-Rollin’ is very much a sport of honor, and trust. But I know that if I did in fact Rick-Roll the shit out of Mike, he’d man up, and be straight with me.

A few seconds pass….

Time is standing still….

And Mike utters his most famous words to date…